亲密关系对于灵性成长是一种助益还是阻碍

Zhang Defen: Here comes another question about intimate relationship. What is the functionality of intimate relationship? besides we are forming a family, and raising kids?  If we are on spiritual path, and we are single, is it necessary to have an intimate relationship? Is it an aid or a hindrance, to our spiritual path?

张德芬：另外一个问题是关于亲密关系的。亲密关系的功能是什么？除了组织家庭、养育孩子，如果我们在寻求灵性成长的道路上，而且是单身，是否还需要有亲密关系呢？这对灵性之路来说，是一种助益还是阻碍？

Sadhguru: Spiritual process is about turning inward.When it comes to going inward, you cann't go hand in hand with somebody.Nobody else can go inside except you. This's a private place.So if you have needs, If you have physical needs, psychological needs, emotional needs, economic or social needs, then you form relationships to fulfill that. That's not something for me to comment, because it's an individual need, each individual may have different kinds of needs.For some it maybe mild, for some it maybe strong. It is an individual requirement.There is no common prescription that everybody should have a relationship or everybody should not have it,There is no such thing. Anyway, to quote somebody,when someone asked this question to Gautama，the Buddha.Gautama said, it's better to walk alone than to walk with a fool.Not me, not me, I didn't say that. Gautama, the Buddha said this because he believes only a fool will choose to walk with you.I am not saying that, Tiffany.

Sadhguru（萨古鲁）：灵性之路意味着转向内在。当你转向内在时，你不能和另一个人手拉手前往。除你之外任何人都去不了，这是你的私人领域。那么，如果你有需求，你有身体上的需求，你有心理上的需求，你有情感上的需求， 你有经济、社交的需求，那么你会建立各种关系，去满足这些需求。这不应该由我来评论， 因为这是属于个体化的需求， 不同的人有不同的需求。对某些人来说是轻微的，对另一些人来说是强烈的。这是个体的需求，不是说每个人都需要建立某种关系或者都不需要，没有这种通用处方，没有这种事情。引用某人的话， 曾有人拿这个问题去问乔达摩佛陀，乔达摩说：“与其和愚者同行，不如自己独行。”我可没这么说过，是乔达摩佛陀说的。因为他认为，只有愚者会选择和你同行， 我可没这么说，Tiffany（张德芬英文名）。

Zhang Defen: But intimate relationships, sometimes can really break your shell and bring yourself to see what is going on inside of you. Sometimes, we tend to ignore it, we pretend to be peaceful, but whenever it comes to intimate relationships.,it gets so difficult to remain peaceful, happy and joyful all the time. So that's a good test.

张德芬：但是有时候，亲密关系确实可以将你打开， 帮助你看清内在的自己。有时候，我们倾向于忽视它，我们假装平和， 但是只要在亲密关系中就很难时时保持平和、快乐了，所以这是一个很好的考验。

Sadhguru: It depends on who you are with.

Sadhguru（萨古鲁）：这也取决于你和谁在一起 。

Zhang Defen: How about a wise guy? If I date a wise guy.

张德芬：那如果我和一个智者约会呢？

Sadhguru: A wise guy may not date you.

Sadhguru（萨古鲁）：智者不一定选择和你约会。

Zhang Defen: Because I am stupid. All right, OK, got that.

张德芬：因为我是个愚人，好吧，我明白啦。

Love&Grace,

Sadhguru

爱与恩典

萨古鲁