“华盛顿110条文明准则——The Rules of Civil
关于“华盛顿110条文明准则—The Rules of Civility”，中文书籍有很多版本。本文中文采用《美国国父华盛顿的110条处世准则》①。英文采用“芒特弗农女士协会——The Mount Vernon Ladies' Association of the Union”②。关于这些文明准则的出处有一些不同的解释，“芒特弗农女士协会“的说明如下：
The Rules of Civility
George Washington wrote out a copy of the 110 Rules of Civility in his school book when he was about 14-years old.
These maxims originated in the late sixteenth century in France and were popularly circulated during Washington's time. This exercise, now regarded as a formative influence in the development of his character, included guidelines for behavior in pleasant company, appropriate actions in formal situations, and general courtesies. Explore the rules as Washington copied them in the 18th century.
中文：（百度翻译）
乔治·华盛顿在他14岁的时候，在他的学校书中写下了110条文明规则的抄本。
这些格言起源于十六世纪晚期的法国，并在华盛顿时期广为流传。这项练习现在被认为是对其性格发展的一种形成性影响，包括令人愉快的处世行为准则，正式情况下的适当行动以及一般的礼貌。探索华盛顿在18世纪复制它们的规则。
该网页还附了一张图片（本图是从其他网站找到的，比原图片好一点），显示为一本书：
《Youths Behaviour,OR, Decency in Conversation Amongst Men》
作者：FRANCIS HAWKINS
此图片为美国亚马逊网站出售的本书现代复制版
在另一网站：http://www.foundationsmag.com/civility.html，有一个更详尽的解释：
By age sixteen, Washington had copied out by hand, 110 Rules of Civility & Decent Behavior in Company and Conversation. They are based on a set of rules composed by French Jesuits in 1595. Presumably they were copied out as part of an exercise in penmanship assigned by young Washington's schoolmaster. The first English translation of the French rules appeared in 1640, and are ascribed to Francis Hawkins the twelve-year-old son of a doctor.
Today many, if not all of these rules, sound a little fussy if not downright silly. It would be easy to dismiss them as outdated and appropriate to a time of powdered wigs and quills, but they reflect a focus that is increasingly difficult to find. The rules have in common a focus on other people rather than the narrow focus of our own self-interests that we find so prevalent today. Fussy or not, they represent more than just manners. They are the small sacrifices that we should all be willing to make for the good of all and the sake of living together.
These rules proclaim our respect for others and in turn give us the gift of self-respect and heightened self-esteem.
Richard Brookhiser, in his book on Washington wrote that "all modern manners in the western world were originally aristocratic. Courtesy meant behavior appropriate to a court; chivalry comes from chevalier – a knight. Yet Washington was to dedicate himself to freeing America from a court's control. Could manners survive the operation? Without realizing it, the Jesuits who wrote them, and the young man who copied them, were outlining and absorbing a system of courtesy appropriate to equals and near-equals. When the company for whom the decent behavior was to be performed expanded to the nation, Washington was ready. Parson Weems got this right, when he wrote that it was 'no wonder every body honoured him who honoured every body.'"
中文（参考百度、微信、谷歌翻译）：
16岁时，华盛顿便手抄写了110条在相处和谈话中遵守的礼貌和体面行为规则。它们是以1595年由法国耶稣会士③组成的一套规则为基础的。据推测，这些字是作为华盛顿年轻校长指定的书法练习的一部分抄录的。
最早的法文本翻译于1640年，被认为是弗朗西斯·霍金斯的儿子，他12岁，是一位医生的儿子。
今天，许多，如果不是所有这些规则，听起来有点吹毛求疵，如果不是彻底的愚蠢。人们很容易将它们斥为过时，适合于粉饰假发和羽毛笔的时代，但它们所反映的是日益难以找到的焦点。这些规则的共同点是关注其他人，而不是我们今天如此普遍的自身利益的狭隘焦点。不管你是否挑剔，他们代表的不仅仅是礼貌。这些都是我们都应该愿意为了所有人的利益和共同生活而作出的小牺牲。
这些规则表明我们对他人的尊重，反过来又赋予我们自尊和高度自尊的天赋。
理查德·布鲁克希瑟在他关于华盛顿的书中写道“在西方世界，所有的现代礼仪原来都是贵族的。礼貌意味着与宫廷相称的行为；骑士风度则来自骑士——骑士。然而，华盛顿要致力于将美国从法院的控制下解放出来。手术后礼貌还能生存吗？在没有意识到这一点的情况下，写这本书的耶稣会士们，以及抄写这些书的年轻人，正在勾勒和吸收一套适合于平等和接近平等的礼貌制度。当行为得体的相处扩展到整个国家时，华盛顿已经做好了准备。帕森·威姆斯说得很对，他写道：“难怪每个人都尊敬那些尊敬每一个人的人。”
“芒特弗农女士协会网站”还有一些关于华盛顿非常有趣、有价值的信息，如：澄清一些关于华盛顿的史实，包括流传最广、最著名的“华盛顿小时候如何诚实的承认用斧子砍樱桃树”的故事。还有关于华盛顿基督教信仰，以及参加共济会等史实介绍。
本文依据“芒特弗农女士协会”网站，2019年6月20日投票统计数据，对“华盛顿110条文明准则——The Rules of Civility”进行了重新排序。这是个简单的投票统计排序，孰轻孰重，读者还需自主衡量评判，仅供参考：
（欢迎留言给出你的排序）
标识：按得票排序—得票数—原排序—中文—英文
1-2430-7.不要当着别人的面脱衣，也不要衣冠不整出门。
RULE NO. 7
Put not off your Cloths in the presence of Others, nor go out your Chamber half Drest.
2-1847-1.与人相处时，言行举止应表现出对对方的尊敬。
RULE NO. 1
Every Action done in Company, ought to be with Some Sign of Respect, to those that are Present.
3-617-6.当别人讲话时，不要打瞌睡；当别人站着时，不要坐着；当应该保持安静时，不要说话；当别人停下时，不要管自行走。
RULE NO. 6
Sleep not when others Speak, Sit not when others stand, Speak not when you Should hold your Peace, walk not on when others Stop.
4-607-2.与人相处时，不要指手画脚，手的放置要自然得体。
RULE NO. 2
When in Company, put not your Hands to any Part of the Body, not usualy Discovered.
5-409-5.当你要咳嗽、打喷嚏、叹气，或者打哈欠时，要尽可能隐秘一些，切忌弄出很大动静；得体的做法是用手帕或手挡住你的脸，并转向无人的一侧。另外，也不要边打哈欠边对人说话。
RULE NO. 5
If You Cough, Sneeze, Sigh, or Yawn, do it not Loud but Privately; and Speak not in your Yawning, but put Your handkercheif or Hand before your face and turn aside.
6-377-4.在别人面前，不要旁若无人地哼歌，也不要用手或脚打拍子。
RULE NO. 4
In the Presence of Others Sing not to yourself with a humming Noise, nor Drum with your Fingers or Feet.
7-375-3.不要对朋友恶作剧，以免使他受到惊吓伤害。
RULE NO. 3
Shew Nothing to your Friend that may affright him.
8-323-82. 不要承诺你做不到的事，不过一旦承诺，就要守信。
RULE NO. 82
Undertake not what you cannot Perform but be Carefull to keep your Promise.
9-317-10.当你坐下时，双脚要平稳踏实，不要两脚叠加，不要跷二郎腿。
RULE NO. 10
When you Sit down, Keep your Feet firm and Even, without putting one on the other or Crossing them.
10-286-110.努力让那被称作良知的圣火在你的胸中熊熊燃烧。
RULE NO. 110
Labour to keep alive in your Breast that Little Spark of Ce[les]tial fire Called Conscience.
11-244-92. 与人进餐时不要拿走盐，不要用你的有油污的刀切面包。
RULE NO. 92
Take no Salt or cut Bread with your Knife Greasy.
12-241-107.当别人在餐桌上谈话时要表现出关注，不过如果口中有食物，就不要讲话。
RULE NO. 107
If others talk at Table be attentive but talk not with Meat in your Mouth.
13-224-43.不要在病人或不幸的人前表现出高兴，因为那样只会加重对方的痛苦。
RULE NO. 43
Do not express Joy before one sick or in pain for that contrary Passion will aggravate his Misery.
14-211-8.在游戏或者围拢烤火时，要给后来者主动让位，并且不要故意大呼小叫。
RULE NO. 8
At Play and at Fire its Good manners to Give Place to the last Commer, and affect not to Speak Louder than Ordinary.
15-211-9.不要往壁炉中吐痰，不要屈身去烤火，不要把手伸到火苗里取暖，不要把脚架在壁炉上，特别是壁炉前面放有食物时。
RULE NO. 9
Spit not in the Fire, nor Stoop low before it neither Put your Hands into the Flames to warm them, nor Set your Feet upon the Fire especially if there be meat before it.
16-211-22.不要对别人的不幸幸灾乐祸，即便他是你的敌人。
RULE NO. 22
Shew not yourself glad at the Misfortune of another though he were your enemy.
17-205-11.不要晃来晃去挡人视线，也不要啃手指甲。
RULE NO. 11
Shift not yourself in the Sight of others nor Gnaw your nails.
18-204-56.假如你珍惜自己的名誉，就结交品质好的人。和坏人交往，还不如独处。
RULE NO. 56
Associate yourself with Men of good Quality if you Esteem your own Reputation; for 'tis better to be alone than in bad Company.
19-190-24.观看公共表演或展览活动时，不要肆无忌惮地狂笑不止。
RULE NO. 24
Do not laugh too loud or too much at any Publick [Spectacle].
20-179-38.在探望病人时，假如你并不了解病情，不要马上就充当医生角色去谈论病情。
RULE NO. 38
In visiting the Sick, do not Presently play the Physicion if you be not Knowing therein.
21-145-40.在和上级意见不一致时，不要试图争辩获胜，只需虚心地提出你的意见。
RULE NO. 40
Strive not with your Superiers in argument, but always Submit your Judgment to others with Modesty.
22-140-51.衣着不可邋遢、破烂、肮脏。每天至少应该刷拭一次衣服，留心不要接近任何不洁之物。
RULE NO. 51
Wear not your Cloths, foul, unript or Dusty but See they be Brush'd once every day at least and take heed tha[t] you approach not to any Uncleaness.
23-140-101. 不要当着别人的面漱口。
RULE NO. 101
Rince not your Mouth in the Presence of Others.
24-137-23.当看到一桩罪行受到惩处时，你自然感到欣慰，但对于受到刑罚惩处的罪犯，应该存有怜悯之心。
RULE NO. 23
When you see a Crime punished, you may be inwardly Pleased; but always shew Pity to the Suffering Offender.
25-133-13.不要当着别人面捉虱子捉跳蚤；如果看到地上有污迹或痰迹，要很灵巧地用脚擦去；如果看到同伴的衣服上有脏物，要不事声张地为他除去；如果发现有人为你除去了身上的脏物，记着一定要道谢。
RULE NO. 13
Kill no Vermin as Fleas, lice ticks &c in the Sight of Others, if you See any filth or thick Spittle put your foot Dexteriously upon it if it be upon the Cloths of your Companions, Put it off privately, and if it be upon your own Cloths return Thanks to him who puts it off.
26-130-14.对人讲话时不要背对着对方；别人正在桌子上读书或写字时，不要碰撞桌子，也不要倚靠在上面。
RULE NO. 14
Turn not your Back to others especially in Speaking, Jog not the Table or Desk on which Another reads or writes, lean not upon any one.
27-124-12.不要摇头晃脑，不要跺脚、抖腿，不要乱转眼珠子，不要把一条眉毛抬得比另一条高，不要歪嘴。在与人靠得很近讲话时，注意不要把唾沫溅到对方脸上。
RULE NO. 12
Shake not the head, Feet, or Legs rowl not the Eys lift not one eyebrow higher than the other wry not the mouth, and bedew no mans face with your Spittle, by appr[oaching too nea]r him [when] you Speak.
28-122-26.见到贵族、法官、牧师等有身份的人时，应该脱帽致礼，以示尊敬，鞠躬时身体的弯曲度要遵从风俗习惯，对不同身份的人各有不同。对同辈人，不要总期望对方先向你施礼。不过，在不需要行脱帽礼时脱帽，就显得做作了。敬礼和答礼的用语要符合通常的习俗。
RULE NO. 26
In Pulling off your Hat to Persons of Distinction, as Noblemen, Justices, Churchmen &c make a Reverence, bowing or less according to the Custom of the Better Bred, and Quality of the Person. Amongst your equals expect not always that they Should begin with you first, but to Pull off the Hat when there is no need is Affectation, in the Manner of Saluting and resaluting in words keep to the most usual Custom.
29-119-89. 不要讲不在场的人的坏话，因为这不公平。
RULE NO. 89
Speak not Evil of the absent for it is unjust.
30-116-109. 消遣娱乐应该是健康向上的，而不应该是低级邪恶的。
RULE NO. 109
Let your Recreations be Manfull not Sinfull.
31-114-108. 当你谈到上帝或其品质时，态度要严肃，满怀敬意。尊重和孝顺你的父母，即便他们是穷人。
RULE NO. 108
When you Speak of God or his Atributes, let it be Seriously & [with] Reverence. Honour & Obey your Natural Parents altho they be Poor.
32-113-15.指甲要干净、要剪短，手和牙齿也要保持清洁，不过，不要对这些事表现出过度的关注。
RULE NO. 15
Keep your Nails clean and Short, also your Hands and Teeth Clean yet without Shewing any great Concern for them.
33-112-105.在餐桌上无论发生了什么都不可生气，假如你真有原因生气，也不要表现出来。而是要表现出高兴的神色，特别是如果有生人在场，因为好心情是宴席上最好的一道菜。
RULE NO. 105
Be not Angry at Table whatever happens & if you have reason to be so, shew it not but on a Chearfull Countenance especially if there be Strangers for Good Humour makes one Dish of Meat a Feas[t].
34-111-44.当一个人尽了他的所能却没有做好某事时，不要责备他。
RULE NO. 44
When a man does all he can though it Succeeds not well blame not him that did it.
35-110-32.在家中接待同等身份或身份略低于自己的人，应该请至上座：而被邀请者首先应该客气婉拒，第二次被邀请时就可就座。没必要表现得畏畏缩缩。
RULE NO. 32
To one that is your equal, or not much inferior you are to give the cheif Place in your Lodging and he to who 'tis offered ought at the first to refuse it but at the Second to accept though not without acknowledging his own unworthiness.
36-109-18.在社交场合，不要读信、看书或看报纸；如果确需读信等，要征得允许离开。在别人看书或写东西时，不要凑上去看，除非被邀请或给你发表意见的机会。别人写信时，未经同意，也不要靠近观看。
RULE NO. 18
Read no Letters, Books, or Papers in Company but when there is a Necessity for the doing of it you must ask leave: come not near the Books or Writings of Another so as to read them unless desired or give your opinion of them unask'd also look not nigh when another is writing a Letter.
37-108-71.不要盯着别人的疤痕或瑕疵，也不要刨根打问。朋友间说的秘密不要透露给他人。
RULE NO. 71
Gaze not on the marks or blemishes of Others and ask not how they came. What you may Speak in Secret to your Friend deliver not before others.
38-108-84. 当你的上司与人讲话时，不要凑耳朵听，也不要去插嘴，更不要发笑。
RULE NO. 84
When your Superiours talk to any Body hearken not neither Speak nor Laugh.
39-106-16.不要鼓腮，不要吐舌，不要搓手，不要摩挲胡须，不要努嘴，不要咬嘴唇，注意嘴不要张得太大，也不要紧闭，要自然合度。
RULE NO. 16
Do not Puff up the Cheeks, Loll not out the tongue rub the Hands, or beard, thrust out the lips, or bite them or keep the Lips too open or too Close.
40-105-99. 喝东西不要太慢。也不要太急。喝之前和之后，要揩擦嘴唇。任何时候喘气声都不要太大，因为那是不文雅的。
RULE NO. 99
Drink not too leisurely nor yet too hastily. Before and after Drinking wipe your Lips breath not then or Ever with too Great a Noise, for its uncivil.
41-103-103. 在与长辈一起吃饭时，不要比他们吃的时间长。可以把手放在餐桌上，但不要把胳膊架在餐桌上。
RULE NO. 103
In Company of your Betters be no[t longer in eating] than they are lay not your Arm but o[nly your hand upon the table].
42-96-20.在你演讲时，身体的姿态、手势，要与之匹配。
RULE NO. 20
The Gestures of the Body must be Suited to the discourse you are upon.
43-96-49.不要使用谴责的语言对待他人，不要诅咒也不要辱骂他人。
RULE NO. 49
Use no Reproachfull Language against any one neither Curse nor Revile.
44-95-19.面部表情要令人愉快，不过在严肃的场合，表情要庄重。
RULE NO. 19
Let your Countenance be pleasant but in Serious Matters Somewhat grave.
45-93-73.讲话前要先想好，发音要准确，语速不要太快，要清晰有条理。
RULE NO. 73
Think before you Speak pronounce not imperfectly nor bring ou[t] your Words too hastily but orderly & distinctly.
46-90-21.不去责备他人天生的缺点，也不因此而心中窃喜。
RULE NO. 21
Reproach none for the Infirmaties of Nature, nor Delight to Put them that have in mind thereof.
47-89-50.不要轻易相信那些诋毁他人的流言蜚语。
RULE NO. 50
Be not hasty to beleive flying Reports to the Disparag[e]ment of any.
48-81-17.不要溜须拍马，也不要调侃那些不喜欢自己被调侃的人。
RULE NO. 17
Be no Flatterer, neither Play with any that delights not to be Play'd Withal.
49-76-35.在商业或公务谈话中，你的讲话应该简短、易于理解。
RULE NO. 35
Let your Discourse with Men of Business be Short and Comprehensive.
50-75-54.不要像孔雀那样炫耀，处处看重自己的外表：打扮得是不是很漂亮；鞋子是不是很合适；袜子是不是很讲究，衣服是不是很时髦。
RULE NO. 54
Play not the Peacock, looking every where about you, to See if you be well Deck't, if your Shoes fit well if your Stokings sit neatly, and Cloths handsomely.
51-74-88. 讲话时要避免单调乏味，避免经常跑题，也要避免老重复同样的讲话方式。
RULE NO. 88
Be not tedious in Discourse, make not many Digressigns, nor rep[eat] often the Same manner of Discourse.
52-72-81. 不要对他人的私事存有好奇心。也不要介入别人的私人谈话。
RULE NO. 81
Be not Curious to Know the Affairs of Others neither approach those that Speak in Private.
53-70- 41.在朋友或同侪的专业问题上，不要以“指导老师”自居，这会让你显得很傲慢。
RULE NO. 41
Undertake not to Teach your equal in the art himself Proffesses; it Savours of arrogancy.
54-70-60.不要下流地唆使朋友去窥探他人的隐私。
RULE NO. 60
Be not immodest in urging your Friends to Discover a Secret.
55-67-98. 说话时不要喝水或喝饮料，不要在嘴里有东西时说话，当你喝东西时，不要东张西望。
RULE NO. 98
Drink not nor talk with your mouth full neither Gaze about you while you are a Drinking.
56-66-58.与人说话不要带有恶意和嫉妒，这是一种温顺和值得赞扬的品性。在所有情绪容易激动的场合，要保持理智和冷静。
RULE NO. 58
Let your Conversation be without Malice or Envy, for 'tis a Sig[n o]f a Tractable and Commendable Nature: And in all Causes of Passion [ad]mit Reason to Govern.
57-64-94. 如果你每次都把面包泡在汤汁里，还不如把它直接放进你的嘴里。如果肉汤太烫，不要去吹，而是要等它自己慢慢凉下来。
RULE NO. 94
If you Soak bread in the Sauce let it be no than what you [pu]t in your Mouth at a time and blow not your broth at Table [bu]t Stay till Cools of it Self.
58-63-74.当别人讲话时，要专心倾听，不要扰乱听众，如果他的讲话有所迟疑停顿，在没有被请求的情况下，不要试图去给他提白或做什么帮助，不要中断他的讲话，也不要当即答辩，直到他结束讲话。
RULE NO. 74
When Another Speaks be attentive your Self and disturb not the Audience if any hesitate in his Words help him not nor Prompt him without desired, Interrupt him not, nor Answer him till his Speec[h] be ended.
59-63-76.当你讲话时，不要用手指点那个你提及的人，也不要太挨近那个人，特别是他的脸。
RULE NO. 76
While you are talking, Point not with your Finger at him of Whom you Discourse nor Approach too near him to whom you talk especially to his face.
60-62-39.在写信或谈话时，要根据对方的身份和当地的习俗，给对方一个适合他的头衔或尊称。
RULE NO. 39
In writing or Speaking, give to every Person his due Title According to his Degree & the Custom of the Place.
61-62-48.在批评他人的某个毛病时，自己必须是没有这个毛病的，因为身教重于言教。
RULE NO. 48
Wherein you reprove Another be unblameable yourself; for example is prevalent than Precepts.
62-62-79.当你不知道事情的真相时，不要自作聪明地发表新闻。在谈论你听到的某事时，最早版本的作者既然不是你，那作者姓名就永远是个难发现的秘密。
RULE NO. 79
Be not apt to relate News if you know not the truth thereof. In Discoursing of things you Have heard Name not your Author always A [Se]cret Discover not.
63-62-95. 不要用刀扎着面包放进嘴里，也不要往盘子里乱吐水果馅饼的籽儿，不要往餐桌下乱丢东西。
RULE NO. 95
Put not your meat to your Mouth with your Knife in your ha[nd ne]ither Spit forth the Stones of any fruit Pye upon a Dish nor Cas[t an]ything under the table.
64-62-97 .在完全咽下去一口食物之前，不要又加上一口。每一口食物都不要太多。不要狼吞虎咽。
RULE NO. 97
Put not another bit into your Mouth til the former be Swallowed [l]et not your Morsels be too big for the Gowls.
65-60-91. 吃饭时不要表现得过分兴高采烈；不要贪嘴；用餐刀切面包。不要靠着饭桌，也不要对你吃的东西挑剔不已。
RULE NO. 91
Make no Shew of taking great Delight in your Victuals, Feed no[t] with Greediness; cut your Bread with a Knife, lean not on the Table neither find fault with what you Eat.
66-60-104. 在就餐时，只有上席的人才有权首先打开餐巾开始用餐，不过他应该及时开始，并注意到让吃饭较慢的人有时间吃完。
RULE NO. 104
It belongs to the Chiefest in Company to unfold his Napkin and fall to Meat first, But he ought then to Begin in time & to Dispatch [w]ith Dexterity that the Slowest may have time allowed him.
67-60-106.入座时不要坐在餐桌的上席。不过如果必须坐，或者主人邀请你，不要推让，以免让其他人尴尬。
RULE NO. 106
Set not yourself at the upper of the Table but if it Be your Due or that the Master of the house will have it So, Contend not, least you Should Trouble the Company.
68-58-25.礼节不可繁琐，也不可在必需时被忽视。
RULE NO. 25
Superfluous Complements and all Affectation of Ceremonie are to be avoided, yet where due they are not to be Neglected.
69-58-37.和有身份的人谈话，不要歪斜身子，也不要盯着对方的脸看，不要靠得太近，至少应保持一步的距离。
RULE NO. 37
In Speaking to men of Quality do not lean nor Look them full in the Face, nor approach too near them at lest Keep a full Pace from them.
70-58-45.在提意见或责备某人时，要考虑是应该在公开场合还是在私下里，或者是改个时间去做。那时批评就不会带上火气，而是比较温和容易让人接受。
RULE NO.45
Being to advise or reprehend any one, consider whether it ought to be in publick or in Private; presently, or at Some other time in what terms to do it & in reproving Shew no Sign of Cholar but do it with all Sweetness and Mildness.
71-58-80.在演讲或宣读时，切忌冗长乏味，除非你发现人们乐于倾听。
RULE NO. 80
Be not Tedious in Discourse or in reading unless you find the Company pleased therewith.
72-58-72.与人交往，不要说别人不懂的方言和你那个圈子里的行话、俚语。庄重的问题要庄重地对待。
RULE NO. 72
Speak not in an unknown Tongue in Company but in your own Language and that as those of Quality do and not as the Vulgar; Sublime matters treat Seriously.
73-58-100. 不要用餐桌布、餐巾擦你的牙齿，或用叉子、餐刀剔牙。如果有人要剔牙，妥善的做法是准备好牙签。
RULE NO. 100
Cleanse not your teeth with the Table Cloth Napkin Fork or Knife but if Others do it let it be done wt. a Pick Tooth.
74-57-53.在街上不要乱跑，也不要太慢慢腾腾，不要傻张着嘴，不要乱挥胳膊。不要翘脚趾，也不要一副手舞足蹈的样子。
RULE NO. 53
Run not in the Streets, neither go t[oo s]lowly nor wit[h] Mouth open go not Shaking y[ou]r Arms [kick not the earth with yr feet, go] not upon the Toes, nor in a Dancing [fashion].
75-57-68.不要去你不熟悉的社交场合，无论你在那里将受到欢迎还是不被欢迎。没有被问到就不要提出建议，如果想提，就尽量简短。
RULE NO. 68
Go not thither, where you know not, whether you Shall be Welcome or not. Give not Advice with[out] being Ask'd & when desired [d]o it briefly.
76-57-75.在别人谈话时，你不请自到，而你察觉到由于你的到来，让谈话停止时，你可以表示歉意，有礼貌地请讲话人继续；当一个有身份的人在你讲话时到来，你应该向他重复一下你先前讲的话。这是有教养的表现。
RULE NO. 75
In the midst of Discourse ask [not of what one treateth] but if you Perceive any Stop because of [your coming you may well intreat him gently] to Proceed: If a Person of Quality comes in while your Conversing it's handsome to Repeat what was said before.
77-56-57.在社交场合走动时，遇到比你身份高的人，最好单独和他在一起，先向他伸出右手，直到他也伸出手。不要先转身走开。当你要转身时，让你的脸对着他。如果他是一个身份高的人，和他一起走动时不要肩并肩，适当落后一些。在这样一种礼貌的方式中，他可以很随意地和你讲话。
RULE NO. 57
In walking up and Down in a House, only with One in Compan[y] if he be Greater than yourself, at the first give him the Right hand and Stop not till he does and be not the first that turns, and when you do turn let it be with your face towards him, if he be a Man of Great Quality, walk not with him Cheek by Joul but Somewhat behind him; but yet in Such a Manner that he may easily Speak to you.
78-56-62.不要在欢乐的时候或在饭桌上讲伤心的事，不要讲诸如死亡、伤病的事，假如别人提及这些事，如果你能，就改变这些话题。除非对亲密的朋友，不要讲你做的梦。
RULE NO. 62
Speak not of doleful Things in a Time of Mirth or at the Table; Speak not of Melancholy Things as Death and Wounds, and if others Mention them Change if you can the Discourse tell not your Dreams, but to your intimate Friend.
79-56-70.不要责难别人的缺点，因为那是父母、师长、上司才有权做的事。
RULE NO. 70
Reprehend not the imperfections of others for that belong[s] to Parents Masters and Superiours.
80-55-96. 太埋首在食物上是不雅的。保持你的手指干净。如果脏了，用你一角的餐桌布擦干净。
RULE NO. 96
It's unbecoming to Stoop much to ones Meat Keep your Fingers clea[n &] when foul wipe them on a Corner of your Table Napkin.
81-54-42.应该根据交往的对象不同而保持适当的礼数，如果对乡下人和王子采用同样的礼节，就显得很可笑了。
RULE NO. 42
Let thy ceremonies in Courtesie be proper to the Dignity of his place [with whom thou conversest for it is absurd to ac]t the same with a Clown and a Prince.
82-51-93. 款待人用餐，要让他吃饱，这才是得体的。但不要擅自去款待那些主人不欢迎的人。
RULE NO. 93
Entertaining any one at table it is decent to present him wt. meat, Undertake not to help others undesired by the Master.
83-50-28.当你坐着时，如果某人过来和你说话，你应该站起来，即便对方是你的下级。当你为人引座时，应根据他的身份和地位。
RULE NO. 28
If any one come to Speak to you while you are are Sitting Stand up tho he be your Inferiour, and when you Present Seats let it be to every one according to his Degree.
84-49-102 .不要老招呼别人吃东西，也不必在你每次喝酒时也向别人劝酒。
RULE NO. 102
It is out of use to call upon the Company often to Eat nor need you Drink to others every Time you Drink.
85-47-78.评价人时不要乱比较。当某人由于勇敢等品德受到赞扬时，不要拿他和别人比三比四。
RULE NO. 78
Make no Comparisons and if any of the Company be Commended for any brave act of Vertue, commend not another for the Same.
86-45-34.在讲话时，让对方先讲，特别是面对身份比我们高的人，我们绝对不应该抢话。这才是好的举止。
RULE NO. 34
It is good Manners to prefer them to whom we Speak befo[re] ourselves especially if they be above us with whom in no Sort we ought to begin.
87-44-65.不要说刺伤人的话，无论是开玩笑还是认真说话；也不要嘲笑任何人，即使他们给了你这样的机会。
RULE NO. 65
Speak not injurious Words neither in Jest nor Earnest Scoff at none although they give Occasion.
88-40-30.就大多数国家来看，右位是尊位，因此在与人一道行走时，要把右侧的位置让给你应该尊重的人，自己走在左侧；如果是三人同行，应该把居中的位置留给三人中最可尊敬的人。如果是二人沿墙同行，要让同伴靠墙走，而自己靠外。
RULE NO. 30
In walking the highest Place in most Countrys Seems to be on the right hand therefore Place yourself on the left of him whom you desire to Honour: but if three walk together the mid[dest] Place is the most Honourable the wall is usually given to the most worthy if two walk together.
89-39-86. 在争论中，不要过于渴望能说服每个人，同时也不要任由每个人随便发表自己的看法。要顺从多数人的意见，特别是当他们是争论中的评判者时。
RULE NO. 86
In Disputes, be not So Desireous to Overcome as not to give Liberty to each one to deliver his Opinion and Submit to the Judgment of the Major Part especially if they are Judges of the Dispute.
90-36-29.当遇到比你身份高的人经过时，应该停下来；如果是在门口，应该退后一步；如果是直接面对面，应该给他让开路。
RULE NO. 29
When you meet with one of Greater Quality than yourself, Stop, and retire especially if it be at a Door or any Straight place to give way for him to Pass.
91-36-36.工人和身份低的人对待贵族或其他身份高的人，不必讲究繁文缛节，但应该表现出尊重和敬意。而身份高的人也同样。他们在对待身份低的人时应该和蔼有礼，不可傲慢自大。
RULE NO. 36
Artificers & Persons of low Degree ought not to use many ceremonies to Lords, or Others of high Degree but Respect and high[ly] Honour them, and those of high Degree ought to treat them with affibility & Courtesie, without Arrogancy.
92-36-52.衣着应该端庄大方，适合自己的气质个性。与其追逐虚荣，宁可与自己同等的人保持风格一致。随时随地以斯文和整洁赢得尊重。
RULE NO. 52
In your Apparel be Modest and endeavour to accomodate Nature, rather than to procure Admiration keep to the Fashio[n] of your equals Such as are Civil and orderly with respect to Times and Places.
93-35-77.要在合适的时间来与人谈论公事。在别人面前不要窃窃耳语。
RULE NO. 77
Treat with men at fit Times about Business & Whisper not in the Company of Others.
94-34-90. 吃饭时不要搔痒，不要吐唾沫、咳嗽，或者抽嗒鼻子去闻，除了确有必要去闻。
RULE NO. 90
Being Set at meat Scratch not neither Spit Cough or blow your Nose except there's a Necessity for it.
95-31-67.不要贬低别人，也不要过分抬高别人。
RULE NO. 67
Detract not from others neither be excessive in Commanding.
96-30-47.不要嘲笑人，也不要在重大问题上乱开玩笑，不要开伤人的玩笑，如果你要就某事发表意见，要显示出富于机智和令人愉快，避免自己成为笑柄。
RULE NO. 47
Mock not nor Jest at any thing of Importance break [n]o Jest that are Sharp Biting and if you Deliver any thing witty and Pleasent abtain from Laughing thereat yourself.
97-29-63.不要夸耀自己的成就、才智，更不要炫耀自己的财富、美德或出身。
RULE NO. 63
A Man o[ug]ht not to value himself of his Atchievements, or rare Qua[lities of wit; much less of his rich]es Virtue or Kindred.
98-28-83 .当你确定要做某事时，不要感情用事，要运用判断力。另一方面，做人也要如此。
RULE NO. 83
When you deliver a matter do it without Passion & with Discretion, howev[er] mean the Person be you do it too.
99-28-85. 在身份比你高的人中，不要随意讲话，直到你被邀请讲话。这时，你应该站直身子，摘下帽子，并用简短的话回答。
RULE NO. 85
In Company of these of Higher Quality than yourself Speak not ti[l] you are ask'd a Question then Stand upright put of your Hat & Answer in few words.
100-28-87 .在倾听别人讲话时，你应该表现得认真和专注。不要总和别人说的唱反调。
RULE NO. 87
Let thy carriage be such as becomes a Man Grave Settled and attentive [to that which is spoken. Contra]dict not at every turn what others Say.
101-27-31.一个人即使年纪比他人大，或地位、功勋比他人高，也应该表现得谦让有礼。无论是居家还是在任何地方，都不应有例外。当然，另一方面，也不可表现得谦卑过头，或者只是偶尔谦卑。
RULE NO. 31
If any one far Surpassess others, either in age, Estate, or Merit [yet] would give Place to a meaner than hims[elf in his own lodging or elsewhere] the one ought not to except it, S[o he on the other part should not use much earnestness nor offer] it above once or twice.
102-27-33.那些身份高贵或担任公职的人在各种场合一般都是优先，但同时，如果他们年轻，他们应当尊敬那些与他们出身或其他方面平等的人，尽管后者没有担任公职。
RULE NO. 33
They that are in Dignity or in office have in all places Preceedency but whilst they are Young they ought to respect those that are their equals in Birth or other Qualitys, though they have no Publick charge.
103-27-55.不要在大街上吃东西，也不要不合时令地在房子里吃。
RULE NO. 55
Eat not in the Streets, nor in the House, out of Season.
104-27-59.在职位或身份比你低的人面前，永远不要表现出任何的失礼，也不要违反道德准则。
RULE NO. 59
Never express anything unbecoming, nor Act ag[in]st the Rules Mora[l] before your inferiours.
105-27-66.不要刚愎自用，而要友善谦恭。首先要礼貌地倾听和回答。在与人交谈时不要独自想心事。
RULE NO. 66
Be not froward but friendly and Courteous; the first to Salute hear and answer & be not Pensive when it's a time to Converse.
106-24-27.向比自己有身份的人致意时，不摘帽是不礼貌的；还有，行脱帽礼不能急匆匆，以致对方都来不及戴好帽子；行礼完毕后，要让对方先戴上帽子，至多是对方第二次邀请后才可戴上自己的帽子。在这里要说明的是，按照礼仪要求，在典礼中，要找好自己的座位再入座，不按规定随便乱坐，是令人生厌的。
RULE NO. 27
Tis ill manners to bid one eminent than yourself be covered as well as not to do it to whom it's due Likewise he that makes too much haste to Put on his hat does not well, yet he ought to Put it on at the first, or at most the Second time of being ask'd; now what is herein Spoken, of Qualification in behaviour in Saluting, ought also to be observed in taking of Place, and Sitting down for ceremonies without Bounds is troublesome.
107-24-64.在没人有开玩笑的心情时，不要逗乐子。笑声不要太大，也不要不分场合。不要嘲笑别人的不幸，即使确有可笑之处。
RULE NO. 64
Break not a Jest where none take pleasure in mirth Laugh not aloud, nor at all without Occasion, deride no mans Misfortune, tho' there Seem to be Some cause.
108-22-46.无论何时何地受到批评，都应该心存感激地接受。不过如果自己没错，不要当时就顶撞，事后找一个便利的时间和地点，向批评者解释。
RULE NO. 46
Take all Admonitions thankfully in what Time or Place Soever given but afterwards not being culpable take a Time [&] Place convenient to let him him know it that gave them.
109-22-61.在庄重的和博学的人中，不要有低俗和轻佻的举动，也不要卖弄非常艰涩困难的问题和话题；对不懂或难以确认的事，不要妄下结论，无论是在长辈面前还是在同辈人中间。
RULE NO. 61
Utter not base and frivilous things amongst grave and Learn'd Men nor very Difficult Questians or Subjects, among the Ignorant or things hard to be believed, Stuff not your Discourse with Sentences amongst your Betters nor Equals.
110-22-69.如果两个人在争执，不要随随便便就介入某一方。在无关紧要的事上，站在多数人一边，不要固执己见。
RULE NO. 69
If two contend together take not the part of either unconstrain[ed]; and be not obstinate in your own Opinion, in Things indiferent be of the Major Side.
——英文方括号[ ]内容，应该是对原手抄本遗漏的修补。
以上仅供参考，谢谢！
------
注释：
①《美国国父华盛顿的110条处世准则》
[美]乔治-华盛顿 著；肖斌 编译
中国国际广播出版社；2007-1
②华盛顿庄园—“芒特弗农女士协会”
https://www.mountvernon.org/george-washington/rules-of-civility
Rules of Civility
Mount Vernon is owned and maintained in trust for the people of the United States by the Mount Vernon Ladies' Association of the Union, a private, non-profit organization.
We don't accept government funding and rely upon private contributions to help preserve George Washington's home and legacy.
芒特弗农由私人非营利组织Mount Vernon女士协会拥有并维持在美国人民的信任之中。
我们不接受政府资助，依靠私人捐款来帮助保护乔治华盛顿的家园和遗产。
③耶稣会 The Society of Jesus（百度百科）
耶稣会，天主教修会。1534年由圣罗耀拉在巴黎大学创立，1540年经教皇保禄三世批准。该会不再奉行中世纪宗教生活的许多规矩，如必须苦修和斋戒、穿统一制服等，而主张军队式的机动灵活，并知所变通。其组织特色是中央集权，在发最后的誓愿之前需经过多年的考验，并对宗座绝对忠诚。耶稣会会士主要从事传教、教育，并组成传教团，积极宣传反宗教改革，1556年圣罗耀拉去世后，其会士已遍布全世界。耶稣会为天主教最大的男修会。
第一任总会长是罗耀拉。罗耀拉的《精神锻炼》（又译《神操》）是耶稣会的行为准则。耶稣会会士可以不穿僧衣，不过隐修生活，渗入社会各阶层，参与各种活动：开办学校、医院、投资工商业，进行科学研究，出入宫廷，担任忏悔师，积极推进海外传教，最早的有圣方济各·沙勿略，来华传教士有利玛窦、汤若望、南怀仁等。耶稣会在巴拉圭建国家近160年（1610—1768）。1773年教宗克雷芒十四世宣布解散。1814年重新恢复。20世纪60年代以来，成为促进天主教现代化的重要力量。现耶稣会有77个教省，在天主教会内影响很大。开办59所大学、500所学院和8500所小学，以及许多杂志、报章、电台等宣传机构。当今教宗方济各即为耶稣会士。
