人们为何不开心
一位朋友感觉不开心，于是到处找人聊天，想要找到办法。
结果别人大多数无法给出解决办法，只是问“那你如何才能开心？”
据说教练技术就是引导咨询者自己思考，不断地进行灵魂拷问。
今天读《相约星期二》，里面有一章写道：
What happened to me? I asked my self. Morrie’s high, smoky voice took me back to my university y ears, when I thought rich people were evil, a shirt and tie were prison clothes, and life without freedom to get up and go motorcy cle beneath y ou, breeze in y our face, down the streets of Paris, into the mountains of Tibet—was not a good life at all. What happened to me?
The eighties happened. The nineties happened. Death and sickness and getting fat and going bald happened. I traded lots of dreams for a bigger pay check, and I never even realized I was doing it.
Yet here was Morrie talking with the wonder of our college years, as if I’d simply been on a long vacation.
“Have y ou found someone to share your heart with?” he asked.
“Are you giving to your community ? ”
“Are you at peace with yourself?”
“Are you try ing to be as human as y ou can be?”
临终前的莫里教授虽然疾病缠身，但是他接受了，毫无怨言。很多人去拜访他，认为他是生死之桥。许多人对他感兴趣，但是真正关心他的到底有多少？很多健康的拜访者并不开心。而他认为这种不开心是社会文化或者说大环境造成的。
“Well, for one thing, the culture we have does not make people feel good about themselves. We’re teaching the wrong things. And y ou have to be strong enough to say if the culture doesn’t work, don’t buy it. Create y our own. Most people can’t do it. They ’re more unhappy than me—even in my current condition. I may be dying, but I am surrounded by loving, caring souls. How many people can say that?”
在莫里教授的眼里，生活就像跷跷板，我们必须做的和我们想要做的或许总有冲突，而最终总是爱会永存。
“Life is a series of pulls back and forth. You want to do one thing, but you are bound to do something else. Something hurts you, yet you know it shouldn’t. You take certain things for granted, even when you know you should never take anything for granted.
“A tension of opposites, like a pull on a rubber band. And most of us live somewhere in the middle. “Sounds like a wrestling match”, I say. “A wrestling match.” He laughs. “Yes, you could describe life that way.”
“So which side wins”, I ask, “Which side wins?”
He smiles at me, the crinkled eyes, the crooked teeth.
“Love wins. Love always wins.”
《罗素随笔精选:什么是快乐的人生》中提到了不快乐的因素包括
拜伦式的情绪
生存竞争的压力
厌烦与兴奋
过度疲劳
妒忌
犯罪感
虐待倾向
金钱的崇拜
无穷的欲望
快乐的要素：
渴望的热情
取舍的智慧
和谐的人格
友好的环境
道德的约束
完美的情爱
美满的婚姻（上）
美满的婚姻（下）
幸福的家庭
充实的工作
休闲的娱乐
科学的力量
自由的社会
