翻译思路拆解:“小镇做题家”要放弃幻想,接受现实
今天这篇推送接着上一篇:翻译思路拆解 | 高考人物特写:小镇做题家刘嘉森
一起来看:
刘嘉森从小就对物质较为敏感。他一直记得自己幼年时搬家到涿州城区时的场景——房子并不小,有120平米,但像样的家具只有亲戚们送的显像管电视机和一套春秋椅,天花板和墙壁上的白色涂漆更让他徒生出“家徒四壁”的感觉。
He’s been sensitive about material life since he was a child. He remembers when he moved to Zhuozhou City when he was a 3-year-old — the house was around 120 square meters, but the only decent furniture was a tube TV and a set of EZ chairs sent by relatives. The white paint on the ceiling and walls made him feel like he was “living in an empty home.”
“家徒四壁”是说一个人很穷,有很多表达,比如as poor as a church mouse, utterly destitute。在这段话中,在大量关于家里环境的描写之后,“家徒四壁”除了要表达出穷,最好还能体现“家”、“壁”的感觉,和前面的“墙壁上的白色涂漆”有所呼应:living in a empty home。
“像样的”,在不同语境下有不同的选词。比如,在说一个人的作品、工作不像样,那就是没有达到理想标准:
Your work isn't really up to the mark.
或者presentable,打扮得像样一点:
I must go and make myself presentable before the guests arrive.
在这个语境中,更多体现在体面不体面decent。比如:
There isn't even a decent table in this room. 这屋里连张像样的桌子也没有。
初中时,他第一次意识到了阶层的差异。当时班上有一些“富二代”同学,因为成绩好,刘嘉森常被带着一起玩。在教育竞争格外激烈的河北省,有位“有文化”的朋友是件“有面子”的事。刘嘉森和这些富家子弟们混在一起,吃饭唱K都不用自己花钱。
He first became aware of class differences in junior high school. Some of the students from wealthier families in his class stuck with Liu because of his good grades. In Hebei, Liu says, where academic competition is fierce, having an “educated” friend is the “dignified” thing to do. So Liu and more affluent children mixed together, and his dinners and karaoke sessions didn’t cost him his own money.
这段话的第二句话,中文没有写得很清楚,但是要注意“成绩好”的主语是刘嘉森,而不是富二代同学。
“在一起”,stick with, hang out with, stay with, mix with。
Associate with sb.和get/be mixed up with sb.也可以表示和谁玩在一起,但一般是跟不太好的朋友厮混,这里并不合适。
“有面子”,和之前说到的“体面”意思很接近,decent, dignified。
说到这个,在上一篇推送中,我们遇到了一个“情商高”:
他意识到,那些欢呼和起哄的声音,不过是因为有的人“情商高”罢了。
He realized that the cheers were just to save him some embarrassment.
今天看雪人,看到一个表述,
a diplomatic dose of flattery,在这里也刚刚好用。
diplomatic的意思是:dealing with people politely and skilfully without upsetting them讲究手腕的,灵活变通的
dose: dose [dəʊs ]:an amount of something that you do or experience at one time, especially something unpleasant一次,一番,一回〔尤指不愉快的经历〕
这句话的上文是说,这个学生到了大学里做自我介绍,很自豪地说自己是高考状元,一时间无人回应,过了很久才有人鼓掌叫好,然后他发现这不过是人家情商高,a diplomatic dose of flattery是也。
“和富家子弟混在一起”,我不是看不起学渣,但是这里可以用刚才说到的associate wtih, get/be mixed up with,因为主语是刘嘉森嘛……
But as a consequence, his ranking slipped from among the top 100 in his grade to below 800. When he saw the ranking, Liu was stunned. He recalls thinking, “No matter how much they play around, their families will prop them up. But I have no one to prop me up.” He needed to work hard to climb back. The higher he could climb, the safer he’d be.
但他的排名也因此从年级100名以内下滑到800多名。看到排名,刘嘉森懵了。他突然意识到,“人家再怎么玩,还有家里兜底。但我是没底的”。他需要努力像上爬,爬得越高,自己就越安全。
“兜底”,一看到这个词,我就想到2021年政府工作报告里的“兜底性民生建设”:
加强普惠性、基础性、兜底性民生建设 ... and ensure that public services are inclusive, meet essential needs, and ensure basic living standards for people in difficulty.
类似的还有2020年的报告:
强化兜底保障 ensure that the basic needs of the poor population are met
保基本、兜底线、建机制 to build up a basic safety net; ensure there is a cushion in place for those most in need; and make relevant institutional arrangements
这里没那么复杂,但意思也是接近的,就是这些富二代再怎么混,都有家庭作为支撑:
刚才例句里有个cushion就很好用:~ (against sth) something that protects you against sth unpleasant that might happen 起保护(或缓冲)作用的事物
His savings were a comfortable cushion against financial problems. 他的积蓄好比一个舒适的垫子,可以缓解拮据之苦。
动词词组prop up, support也可。
Now, on most days, Liu wears the same plaid shirts he did in junior high school. But, when he first started his lecture tours, he says his appetite for material possessions increased exponentially. At the time, he’d buy 10 outfits online in one breath, and put the ones that didn’t fit in a closet, too lazy to return them.
现在,刘嘉森每周至少一半的时间都会穿着初中时的那件格子衬衫,但回顾刚开始巡讲时,他觉得是自己物欲急速膨胀的状态。当时,他会一口气网购下十件衣服,不合适的就放在柜子里,懒得退换。
物欲,material desire, desire for material goods, appetite for material possessions;
急速膨胀,除了用“增长 (v.) +急速 (adv.)”的组合外,也可以用“膨胀”做动词,swell with 表示充满了……,swell with an appetite for material possessions。
“一口气”,at/in one go, in one breath;
“懒得退换”形容主语“他”的状态,因此用形容词做状语,too lazy to return them。
大二、大三两年,刘嘉森像是又回到了在衡中时挤压时间、把效率拉满的状态。最多一周要演讲四天,去八个不同的学校。刘嘉森也真的变了。
During his sophomore and junior years, Liu Jiasen was squeezing time and stretching his efficiency to the fullest — just like at Hengshui High School. At his busiest, he had to speak four days a week at eight different schools. During this time, Liu says he changed.
把效率拉满,stretch可表示:[ VN ] to make use of a lot of your money, supplies, time, etc. (大量地)使用,消耗,stretch his efficiency to the fullest/to the limit, be fully stretched as it is。
高中毕业时他“话都说不利索”,而现在,他的声音抑扬顿挫,回答学生的一个提问,可以不停歇地讲上四五分钟。请客吃饭、给室友买礼物的次数也多起来,同寝的朋友笑称他为“刘总”。相对于“刘状元”,他更喜欢这个称呼。
When he graduated from high school, he “couldn't speak well,” he says, but now his voice booms, and he can speak for four or five minutes without stopping. He’d treated his roommates to dinner and bought them so many gifts that his friends in the dorm jokingly called him “Boss Liu.” He prefers this to “No. 1 Scholar Liu.”
“抑扬顿挫”,用“他”做主语,speak in measured tones;用“声调”做主语,intonation is cadenced;作状语的话,with rise and fall in cadence/voice。
“次数”不必照着翻译,转为“许多、经常”,often treat his roommates to dinner, buy them many gifts。
“请客吃饭、给室友买礼物的次数也多起来,同寝的朋友笑称他为“刘总”。”这两句话之间有一个因果关系,因为经常请客吃饭买礼物,所以人家才叫他刘总。翻译的时候可以把这个逻辑关系给体现一下,so + adj. +that从句,表示太……以至于……。
很快,刘嘉森就要踏上下一次为期近一个月的巡讲之旅。演讲前,他总会陷入纠结——究竟是否要让学生们从幻想中脱离出来,接受这世界的真相:
But as his next lecture tour approaches, Liu is conflicted about the students he’ll address. He often wonders if he should tear the veil off their illusions and help them accept the truth of this world.
“陷入纠结”,conflicted adj. confused about what to do or choose because you have strong but opposing feelings 因心理冲突而不知所措的
也可以认为他此刻陷入了一种两难的处境,一方面是听从公司安排打鸡血,另一方面是在想要不要告诉学生这个世界的真相:face a dilemma, be in a dilemma。
“脱离幻想”,刘嘉森做主语的话,separate the students from illusions, 译者用了一个“撕去面纱”的表达tear the veil off。如果用学生做主语,abstain from。
也可以把“脱离幻想”和后面的“接受”结合起来翻译,“接受”处理成介词,比如:
Forsake illusions for reality
关于中文动词与英文介词之间的转换,我们之前也提到过多次了:
英语介词很多表示动作、目的、意志、方向、手段,本身就暗含动作味道,翻译成汉语的动词也是顺理成章。比如:
Of the people, by the people, for the people 民有,民治,民享。
a new change on the model, 这种模式出现了新变化。
out of interest,出于兴趣,依随喜好。
out of the dilemma,摆脱困境,走出困境。
under market pressure,迫于市场压力,受市场压力的影响。
Milder slowdowns have scared the government off the path of prudence before.以前经济增速放缓幅度没这么大时,政府就吓得舍弃了审慎之路。
本系列完结。
虽然平日里小姐姐们工作缠身,更新慢,但每一次,我们都诚意满满。