孩子，如果有人打了你 (汉译英)

孩子，如果有人打了你

Hi, my dear kid, what if you were bullied?

1

教育界曾经有一个课题是：“你的孩子，如果被别的孩子打了，你会教育孩子怎么办？”

辩论很多，印象最深的是四个观点：

Parents and teachers are, more often than not, concerned

about this question:“What ideas could you offer your kid if he were bullied by

other kids?”

1.用合适的方式告诉长辈。

1. Let your

parents or family know it in the proper way.

2.要尽量避免正面冲突。

2. Try to avoid the head-on confrontation.

3.如果不是什么大事，则要懂得吃亏。

3. Just take it lying down if it is not a serious case.

4.打回去啊。

4. Just fight back.

从前，我对这个课题一直保持着一定的距离。因为许多年前，我还没有孩子，人生的重心，就是一个人的成长。我也不会想到，多年之后，当我自己遇到“孩子被打”后，孩子自己的反应，会显得如此宽容和理解。

In the past I was not quite interested in such a topic as

I didn’t have any kid many years ago and I only

paid attention to my personal growth. To my surprise, many years later when I

faced the fact that“my kid was beaten

by other kids”, the immediate

response from my kid seemed to be so tolerant and considerate.

2

前些日子，和女儿去游乐园玩。周末的游乐场就像一个巨大的澡堂，每个人都自顾自，似乎没什么交集。

Some days ago, I took Daughter to Amusement Park, which issomething like a huge bathhouse at weekends, and where everyone just caredabout themselves without any communication at all.

女儿很喜欢去游乐场，三岁了，孩子多的地方，似乎总是感觉有了自己的小世界。

My 3-year-olddaughter loves this place, particularly a place crowded with kids, which seemsto be her small world.

忽然间，一个男孩冲了过来，夺女儿手中的玩具，并狠狠地用手打了女儿的脸。我为什么觉得这是狠的，因为女儿的脸一下子撇了过去。

All of asudden, a boy rushed toward her, tearing her toy away from her hands and hittingher hard in the face. Why did I say the hit was so hard because she turned herface aside with the slap.

女儿没有哭，她比我的反应更加决断和直接，她伸手打了那个小男孩，打在了那个男孩子的手臂。

Daughter didn’t cry but stretchedout her hand to beat that boy on the arm, which was a direct and resolute responsefaster than I could do anything.

男孩子开始大哭，我和女儿站在原地。女儿还是会胆小，不停地往我身上凑。但她知道，我从来不随意批评她，犯错需要承担责任，女儿并不是主要的过错一方。

The boy burst out crying and Daughter and I stayed put.After all, Daughter was quite nervous and tried to move closer to me. However,she knows that I never scold or blame her indiscriminately. Anyone shall beliable for having made a mistake, but Daughter is not the wrongdoer who shouldassume the lion’s share of responsibilities.

男孩撒泼打滚躺在地上。我和女儿站在一边。我也是第一次看到这样的孩子。我一直觉得，每一个孩子的模样，就是原生家庭的教养。那种深刻的印记，是逃也逃不掉的。

The boy made a scene by rolling on theground while crying bitterly. I stood there with Daughter, and this is thefirst time I can see a kid of that kind. In my opinion, the way each kidbehaves represents the cultivation of the original family. However, thisimpression is deeply ingrained in my mind.

他的母亲跑了过来，抱着儿子说，是不是妹妹打了你，是不是妹妹打了你。那镜头，我恍惚间觉得自己在看电视剧。

Over ran his mama, and picked him up,

saying,“Didn’t the girl

beat you? Just let me know!”I dimly felt that

that scene was just like the one in a TV play.

男孩子自然忘了自己伸手先打了我的女儿，只说“妹妹打我”。他的母亲一边斜着眼，一边恶狠狠地对我说：你得让你女儿道歉。

The boy naturally forgot that fact that it

was him who first hit my daughter, but only replied,“Yeah, it is

her”. His mom gave us a sideways glance and called

out to me,“You have to ask your daughter to say sorry.”

而她似乎并没有看到，女儿脸上还有她儿子打的浅浅的掌印。

But she didn’t seem tosee the shallow palm print left on the face of my daughter.

我觉得我有必要告诉她，这个事情的过程：

I thought it quite necessary to let her know the ins andouts of the matter:

一、你儿子先打了我女儿，而且打在脸上，你儿子手上的玩具就是从我女儿手上夺来的。

1. It was your son who hit my daughter on

the face first and the toy in his hand is the one torn away from my daughter’s hand.

二、我女儿脸上还有你儿子打的手印，你可以仔细看。

2. There is the clear mark of your son’s handprints on her face, so just have a good look.

三、你儿子向我女儿道歉的话，我女儿也可以向你儿子道歉。

3. If your son first apologizeto her and she may also say sorry to him.

那个家长斜了我一眼，抱着儿子就走。

She lookedaskance at me and away she went with her son in her arms.

女儿看起来很高兴，这个大大咧咧的孩子啊，第一次搂着我又亲又抱。我知道，女儿喜欢我的决定。

Daughter was quite happy as a carefree girl,

and hugged and kissed me for the first time. As I know, Daughter buys my final

say.

3

说真的，这些年看到很多“孩子伤害孩子”的新闻：

As a matter of fact, we have seen a lot of news reportsabout “bullies among kids”.

2015年，某个小学生因为被同桌欺负，同桌经常用笔戳她的手臂，还各种侮辱她，导致神经衰弱，不敢上学，最后严重到一听说上学，就浑身发抖。欺负她的那个学生家长是学校的一个老师，所以班主任并没有对欺负的同学做出任何处理，听之任之，一直到这件事被媒体爆出，才对欺负的同学进行管教。

In 2015 aprimary school student was bullied by her deskmate who often jabbed her in thearm with a pen coupled with all kinds of other insults, causing her to sufferfrom neurasthenia and refuse to go back to school. So in the end she was tremblingall over at the mere mention of school. The parent of the bully is a teacher ofthe school, so the head teacher didn’t do anything about the bully but letthings drift. It was not until this matter was exposed by the media that thehead teacher began to discipline the boy.

2015年，“高中女生遭同学轮番施暴，不敢吱声”视频传在网上引发热议，画面中，那个女生不断地被扇耳光，却一声不吭。

In 2015 a video entitled“a senior

high school girl cruelly assaulted into silence by classmates”was posted online, causing a big stir among the public.In the video the victim was repeatedly slapped into silence.

我一直觉得，性格的所有线索都可以追溯至童年。凯瑟琳·凯利·莱内曾经有一句话是，为什么童年的记忆特别真切，那是因为它们是最初的人生体验，带着某种特殊的味道。

I alwaysthink that all clues of the personal character can be traced back to his or herchildhood. Kathleen Kelley-Laine once remarked, “how come that the memory ofchildhood is especially true as they represent the initial life experience witha special flavor.”

一个人长大后的样子，或多或少是童年许多个瞬间堆积而成的。这件华丽的袍子充满着时间的虱子，它们牢牢地抓着，怎么也甩不掉。

When aperson grows up, what he is now is based on many a moment of his childhood. Thismagnificent robe is fully covered with the lice of the time: they just stick onand reject to fall down anyhow.

我常常在想一句话：不伤人是一种教养，但不被别人伤害是一种气场。而这一点，或许从孩子开始面对这个世界，就开始需要让他知道了。

More oftenthan not, I think of such a saying:Not hurting

or harming others is an upbringing, but not being hurt or harmed is a positive temperament.

As such, maybe a kid shall be encouraged to face this world and know some Do’s

and Don’ts.

4

我婆婆曾经很奇怪的问我：在别人打了女儿之后，看到女儿冲过去还击，也从不把她拉回来。

My mother-in-law once asked me weirdly,“When you saw your daughter was beaten and she rushed up

to fight back, why didn’t you pull her

back?”

我说，我相信一个孩子的判断。而事实也证明，在孩子的心中，永远是爱憎分明的，他们对爱她的人充满着好感，对伤害她的人会回击。而这又是人最初也最珍贵的棱角。

I answered, I trust it was the judgment

made by a kid. However, the fact turns out that kids can always draw a clear

distinction between Love and Hate in their hearts. They show great affection

toward the people kind and friendly to them and will fight back to those

hurting or harming them, which is the most valuable edge angle in early life.

我一直不赞成从前的教育方式，对别人的伤害要忍让，甚至要以德报怨，因为我觉得被伤害后不反抗，会让孩子渐渐失去对这个世界最初的好恶的判断，让伤害的人知道自己不可以随意被伤害，其实就是一种本能。

I am not quite in favor of the previous education model,requiring the tolerance of the hurt or harm caused by others even by returninggood for evil because I think that a kid can gradually lose his or her firstlikes and dislikes for the world if he or she does not fight back while beinghurt and that is an instinct to let the hurt persons know they can not beeasily hurt.

所以，孩子，如果有人打你，你一定要尊重精神和肉体的第一意愿，不害怕地反抗；孩子，如果有人打你，你一定要披好你的铠甲，让他们无处可攻；孩子，如果有人打你，一定要学会立即保护自己，必要的时候这样的保护可能是躲避，也可能是还击，在不得不还击的时候，一定要立即出手，保护好自己，但我们的出手行为只是为了保护自己，绝不是为了造成二次的伤害。

So my dear kid, if you are bullied, youmust respect the first will of the spirit and body to fight back without fearand you must be well armored against any attach from others; my dear kid, ifyou are bullied, you must learn to immediately protect yourself, which may be awise escape for a proper protection as occasion requires, and sure you canfight back when you have to, and that to protect yourself with immediatereaction. But our reaction is only to protect ourselves without causing thesecondary harm or hurt.

不进一寸，也不失一毫。

Never go aninch more, nor do you lose a dime.

我始终觉得，这个世界从来是有经纬度的，不会因为你的忍让而缩水，也不会因为你的强悍而膨胀，你要懂得游刃有余最好的方式是，内心柔软而有原则，身披铠甲而有温度。

Constantlydo I feel that this world tends to have its latitude and longitude without any shrinkagedue to your tolerance, nor does it dilate due to your valiance. You must keepin mind the best way to handle a tough situation: Retain a tender heart and disciplineyourself and be well armored but with warmth.

孩子，做一个勇敢而温暖的孩子，不暖到烫伤自己，也不冷到冻伤身体，如果有人打你，就勇敢地按照自己的方式回击。你的回击越掷地有声，你的未来更充满坦途。

My dear kid,be a brave and warm kid. Try to be warm enough not to hurt yourself and try tobe cold-tempered but not to have the cold injury. If you are bullied, boldlyfight back in your own manner. The harder you can fight back, the smoother andbrighter your future will be.

没有人可以照顾你一生，而你要学会爱着自己，从现在开始。

No one can look after you all your life, so

just start from now on to learn how to take good care of yourself.

阎成席翻译