雅思大作文原创日更020-参与社区慈善和公益的方式

（唐老雅老师2018年7-9月雅思大作文预测题第6题）

一、题目

Some people prefer to help directly in the local community for people who need it, however, others prefer to give money to the national or international charities, discuss both views and give your own opinion.（社会+资助方式）

二、解析

这是一道社会资助方式的观点类题目。题目的关键词是：直接帮助与间接慈善捐款。题目限定考生双边讨论两种观点并给出自己的意见。所以考生在论证思路方面没有什么发挥的空间，不过可以在理由、例证方面一展身手。这个题目让我想到了青少年去福利院、孤儿院、养老院做公益活动帮助需要帮助的人；国外医学院要求医科学生每学期假期完成在社区医院的义工服务；一些商业机构员工定期进行的社区义务垃圾清扫活动；某些慈善组织不定期发起的面向贫困地区的慈善捐赠旧衣物等直接扶助社会行为。间接慈善捐助行为我想到了比尔盖茨和扎克伯格的慈善基金创建；国内每年进行的善款定点精准扶贫活动以及许多商家做的面向客人的筹集慈善捐款的活动。直接参与慈善活动的作用是给予受助人切实的帮助和支持，以及提升参与者能力、洗涤净化参与者心灵和营造和谐文明的人文生态社区环境。直接参与慈善活动的问题是对帮扶对象造成一定的干扰以及不能给予他们选择的自由。间接善款资助也可以让受助人有更多的自主性和灵活性来改善自己的生活境遇，方便没有时间和精力的捐助人表达爱心，问题是造成钱可以解决一切问题的误解以及同情心的淡漠。我的立场是走中间道路，两种方式有机结合。

三、一稿

1、开头

In our neighbourhood, there are quite a number of people who are old, weak, sick or handicapped needing our attention and support to sustain their life. （注1: 这里我从背景出发切入论题。）Some folks are in favor of offering direct help to them, while others prefer to donate charitable fund. In the following, I’d like to examine both views and put forward my own position.（注2: 在这里我改述题目，引出下文。）

2、主体#1段

Although offering direct help to those in need may have the drawbacks of disturbing the normal life of the needy and do poor in giving them freedom of choices in the respect of whatever charitable assistance they need most, this mode of compassionate acts have the benefits of giving the needy most urgent support and create a very visible harmonious community. For instance, when volunteers pay a regular visits to the nursing home for the lonely elders or orphanages for the pitiful deserted kids by their biological parents in the society to cheer them up or keep them company, the positive welfare brought to the needy are tremendous and irreplaceable. While the biyearly vacation compulsory volunteer service of the medical majors of some overseas medical universities not only help the college students to get familiar with the work in the community hospitals but also give the patient precious help and cultivate the sense of compassion and develop the prospective medical staff’s professional capacity which is felt very multi-win measures. Hence straightforward help to the needy like these ones are obvious necessary and crucial. (注3: 这一段我采用先抑后扬的方式讨论了直接的善举的作用。其中直接的善举在我的解析当中考虑到时间和篇幅的关系只是精选了两条，没有全用。）

3、主体#2段

In contrast, despite the false impression that the monetary donations might impose on people that if you throw cash on something it will go away automatically, the indirect way to help the needy by donating money to the people in need is also very essential. A well-known examples are the charitable foundations set up by world billionaires like Bill Gates and Facebook founder Yak Zhakegerge（注4: 小扎的英文名有点不确定，看来平时英语知识和信息的积累还有待加强。稍后我会去百度确认一下这个信息。）contribute hugely to overcome the cure of serious disease of some poverty-stricken districts in the world as well as impart latestest science and technology knowledge to and enlighten the young generation in the poor and backward areas. What’s more, the annual one-to-one accurate poverty relief fund raising event by the local individual CPC party branches in the more developed regions in mainland China is another typical case to achieve philanthropy ideals through direct financial funding. （注5: 这一段我仍然采用先抑后扬的方式引出第二个分论点并着重讨论了间接慈善捐助的意义。声东击西及先扬后抑或先抑后扬是笔者若水我增加字数和向评卷考官展示创作个性和才华的一个秘方。在此无偿友情与各位雅思大作文创作小伙伴们分享。）

4、结尾

To conclude, neither the direct or the indirect ways to help the people in need are perfect. These two charitable modes have their own advantages and disadvantages. What we should do now is to balance all the merits and defects and come up with an option that are most feasible and beneficial to the needy compatriots around us.（注6: 本段我用高度概括的方式总结全文，得出结论。）

四、中场休息， 稍后回来，拜。