dream s

yesterday I dreamt of the daughters of my siblings and we under stood each other by crying together.

this morning I dreamt of my living relations as we gathered somewhere that I couldn't name and I asked them whether they missed those deceased family members. and I cried myself because someone had occupied my mind. I didn't realize how precious they were when they were alive as if I were blind. it seems that dreams can make us subjective and totally emotional. I didn't know why this thing would happen. I guessed  we all were bereaved when some familiar ones were mentioned. it is like we have a wound which is too sore and sensitive to be touched or reminded. Why do all the feeling s matter in a dream? Why are we so numb when we live daily life? Have all the senses been helping us to survive? I guess there's an awareness which defies how we live every day. Therefore, I am too igrant and too weak. I have to be the strongest saint to take care of every one.

Namas Amitabha

PS: i can vaguely remember someone asked me what is prajna last night or other Buddhist term. But I was too ignorant to repeat this piece of information. I now realize that I had disobeyed what had been taught by my venerable teacher Meng can because he told us to be humble and ready to help others. It dawns on me that I have been to uncontrollable and naive in dreams. Doubtless ly, there is a daunting task for me to practice my religion when I am asleep. And I have to take all the challenges willingly because I couldn't bear the consequences of default choices.

I have always been thinking of drawing a painting of the Pure-land. But I couldn't find a time to arrange this event. there should be no delay ing for such a meaningful thing. mom told me that the day after tomorrow it would rain and tomorrow it could be cloudy and rainy. it is a cloudy day today. The gloomy sky heralds the incoming spring season. The four seasons alternate and the mechanism of heaven and earth  is so duty bound.
All the harvests are I stroke for sentient beings who are diligent.