哪句有语法错误？

1. Liu Bin is employed at a T. V. station working as a news reporter.
2. Liu Bin works at a T. V. station as a news reporter.
3. Liu Bin is a news reporter at a T. V. station.
4. Liu Bin is a T. V. news reporter.

四句话语法都对，但句1中的 is employed 为被动语态，且与working as意义重复，可进行合并。
一般情况下，主动语态表意更为直接和清晰，因此这里使用主动语态更好，具体修改见句 2。
如果调整语序，先表明“ a news reporter” 的身份，则可以省去动词 work，使句子进一步简化，详见 句3。
进一步 看，“ at a T. V. station (在电视台工作)” 和“ as a news reporter (做新闻记者)” 在意思上还有重合的部分，可进一步“ 删繁就简”，合并 为“ a T. V. news reporter”，详见句4。

判断以下哪句表达更好

1. Sun Hong is determined in her mind to loseweight.
2. Sun Hong is determined to lose weight.

1. This book will help you master the basics of good writing.
2. This book will help you master the basic elements of good writing.

1. It makes me feel painful to think that she has to work 12 hours a day and seven days a week.
2. It pains me to think that she has to work 12 hours a day and seven days a week.
it makes me sad/ cheerful， 可表达为 it saddens/ cheers me

尝试改写句子

The search of the forest that they conducted was entirely complete.

① The search of the forest was complete.
② They conducted a complete search of the forest.

He has no sense of principles, whether he is in public or in private.

He has no principles, public or private.
whether in white or in black， 可简化为 black or white
whether in theory or in practice， 可简化 为 in theory or in practice。

In a cautious manner the car went around the corner.

① The car went around the corner cautiously.
② The car negotiated the corner.

Another important aspect is good health. It is one of our great blessings. It may be achieved through proper diet and exercise. Rest is also desirable.

The great blessing of good health maybe achieved through proper diet, exercise, and rest。

If the government agency finds that an individual has received a payment to which the individual was not entitled,whether or not the payment was due to the individual’ s fault or misrepresentation, the individual shall be liable to repay to the government the total sum of the payment to which the individual was not entitled.

If the government agency finds that you received a payment that you weren’ t entitled to, you must pay the entire sum back.

如何做到concision

1. 删除意义重复的单词或短语
   Two joint partners will present their views over a long- distance telephone call.
   Two partners will present their views over a long- distance call.
   We sometimes make choices that put our lives in jeopardy where death can occur.
   We sometimes make choices that put our lives in jeopardy.
2. 用介词(短语)替代从句
   While they were playing tennis, she started an argument that lasted all morning.
   During tennis, she started an argument that lasted all morning.
   When you come to the second traffic light, turn right.
   At the second traffic light, turn right.
   When you turn to page 120, you will see two historical pictures of pre-1920 Shanghai.
   At page 120, you will see two historical pictures of pre-1920 Shanghai.
3. 用过去分词形式替代从句
   The novel, which is written in three parts, told a story that is set in the Middle Ages.
   ① Written in three parts, the novel told a story set in the Middle Ages.
   ② The three-part novel told a story set in the Middle Ages.