Welearn写作宝典英语二
Welearn写作宝典英语二
第一章、考研英语写作（二）简介
杨凡达
Part A
Directions: Suppose you won a translation contest; your friend Jack wrote an
email to congratulate you and ask advice on translation. Write him a reply to
1) thank him, and
2) give your advice.
You should write about 100 words on the ANSWER SHEET. Do not sign
your own name at the end of the letter. Use “Li Ming” instead.
Do not write the address. (10 points)
Part B
Directions: In this section, you are asked to write an essay based on the
following chart, in which you should
1) interpret the chart and
2) give your comments.
You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)
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主讲老师：杨凡达老师
Welearn写作宝典英语二
第二章、考研英语写作（二）评分标准
5分首段描述
The chart gives the propotions of different kind of the investagation that the
purpose of college students who taking for trips. Tourism for sightseeing,
driving thier pressure away and other purposes take up 37% 33% 15%.
Purpose for making friends and digging out their independent ability take up
less, about 9% and 6%.
8分首段描述
The pie chart above clearly illustrated the purpose of undergraduates’ traveling.
37% students said they travel just to enjoy the beauty of scenery. While 33%
students thought they going out to relieve pressure. Students’ other purposes
such as making more friends, fostering capability of independence and other
reasons relatively account for 15%, 6% and 9%.
11分首段描述
The pie shows that the proportions of various reasons of college students’
travelling. According to it, 37% of students go travelling are to enjoy the scenery
and 33% travel to get themselves out of pressure. Another one third of students
are on the purposes of making friends, being independently and so on.
14分首段描述
The chart gives a breakdown of the proportions of students from a college who
travel for different purposes. As it stands, 37% respondents tell that they travel
for sightseeing, followed by 33% relieving stress. Besides, those touring to
make friends and to learn to be independent share 9% and 6% respectively.
【评分细则】
第五档 A节（9-10分）B节（13-15分）
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Welearn写作宝典英语二
很好地完成了试题规定的任务。
——包含所有内容要点；
——使用丰富的语法结构和词汇；
——语言自然流畅，语法错误极少；
——有效地采用了多种衔接手法，文字连贯，层次清晰；
——格式和语域恰当贴切。
对目标读者完全产生了预期的效果。
第四档 A节（7-8分）B节（10-12分）
较好地完成了试题规定的任务。
——包含所有内容要点，允许漏掉1、2个次重点；
——使用较丰富的语法结构和词汇；
——语言基本准确，只有在试图使用较复杂结构或较高级词汇时才有个别语
法错误；
——采用了恰当的衔接手法，层次清晰，组织较严密；
——格式和语域较恰当。
对目标读者完全产生了预期效果。
第三档 A节（5-6分）B节（7-9分）
基本完成了试题规定的任务。
——虽漏掉一些内容，但包含多数内容要点；
——应用的语法结构和词汇能满足任务的需求；
——有一些语法及词汇错误，但不影响理解；
——采用了简单的衔接手法，内容较连贯，层次较清晰；
——格式和语域基本合理。
对目标读者基本完全产生了预期的效果。
第二档 A节（3-4分）B节（4-6分）
未能按要求完成试题规定的任务。
——漏掉或未能有效阐述一些内容要点，写了一些无关内容；
——语法结构单调、词汇项目有限；
——有较多语法结构及词汇方面的错误，影响对于写作内容的理解；
——未采用恰当的衔接手法，内容缺少连贯性；
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主讲老师：杨凡达老师
Welearn写作宝典英语二
——格式和语域不恰当。
未能清楚地传达信息给读者。
第一档 A节（1-2分）B节（1-3分）
未完成试题规定的任务。
——明显遗漏主要内容，且有许多不相关的内容；
——语法项目和词汇的使用单调、重复；
——语言错误多，有碍读者对内容的理解，语言运动能力差；
——未采用任何衔接手法，内容不连贯，缺少组织、分段；
——无格式和语域概念。
未能传达信息给读者。
零档（0分）
所传达的信息所使用语言太少，无法评价；内容与要求无关或无法辨认。
【关于内容要点】
5分范文
The data shows us the view of college students for tourism‘s meaning.
Nowadays, students spend most of thier daily time for taking class. Seldom can
they have chance to go far places to visit. They wanna go to different places to
enjoy beautiful senery during haolidays and vacation so as to relive stresses
and develop their inner independence, also making new friends during the trip.
11分范文
Today, more and mre students enrich their knowledge and experience by
traveling. On one hand, college students attained enough knowledge from
books, which should be connected with the life. Then, travel would be a better
choice. By the way, during the travel, a person can put aside their puzzing
problems and relax themselves. Then, with a better emotion, they come back
to their studies. On the other hand, it is our socity’s requirement. Our society
need not only the knowledgeable person, but the ones who can express their
ideas independently, knowing the world widely and have good relationship
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主讲老师：杨凡达老师
Welearn写作宝典英语二
among their peers. Travel can help college students achieve them.
【关于语法结构和词汇】
（外刊好词好句）Just as drones（无人机） can make up for poor roads, the
theory goes, mobile phones can overcome a lack of well-functioning banks,
portable solar panels can stand in for missing power stations and free learning
apps can substitute for patchy education.
（学生作品）We live in different countries, speak different languages, but love
is something common to us all. But how to show love may be different with
different people in different countries.
（如何丰富语法结构和词汇）
例 1：年轻人应该学会相互尊重。
例 2：大多数老年人都渴望安度晚年。
【关于语言错误】
14分范文
As is shown in the chart, mobile phone subscriptions grow rapidly from 2000
and 2008. We can also find that developing countries are the driving force for
such a rapid growth. According to the chart, mobile-phone subscription number
increased to 8 times from 2000 to 2008, that is from around 0.5 billion to 4 billion,
while subscription number only increased twice from around 0.5 billion to 1
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主讲老师：杨凡达老师
Welearn写作宝典英语二
billion.
8分范文
As clearly seen from the chart that mobile-phone subscriptions are between
developing countries and developed countries from 2000 to 2008. According to
the chart mentioned above, we can see in 2000, the mobile phone subscription
numbers are 0.5 billion in developing countries, but the numbers are 0.7 billion
in developed countries. However, the mobile-phone subscription numbers are
4 billion in developing countries in 2008, meanwhile, the phone numbers are
still 1 billion in developed countries. For my respective, there are some reasons
as below:
一眼可识别的语言错误
●句子成分不完整（主要表现为缺少谓语）
●句子成分多余（主要表现为连写谓语或连写句）
●名词短语类错误（主要表现为冠词、单复数、可数不可数）
●常见搭配(动词短语、形容词短语和名词短语)
例 1：There are many ways to keep fit. Swimming, skating, climbing, jogging,
and so on.
例 2：Many people are afraid of making choices. Because they fear that what
are not chosen might turn out to be better.
例 3：Quite a few young people think that protect the environment is none of
their businesses.
【关于结构和连贯性】
14分范文
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主讲老师：杨凡达老师
Welearn写作宝典英语二
Why does this phenomenon appear? I think there are several possible reasons
for this. First, with a rapid growth of population, more and more people came to
live where some wild species have been living. Then these species have to
move to other places. Some of them probably cannot adapt to the new
environment and die. Second, although many people look on the wildlife as
their friends, some people may not think so. They catch a lot of wild animals
and sell them in order to get more money. Third, with the development of the
industry, the natural balance and the ecologic environment are destroyed. The
deforestation has become more and more serious. So some of the wildlives
become homeless and extinct.
A节官方范文精讲
Directions: You have just come back from Canada and found a music CD in
your luggage that you forgot to return to Bob, your landlord there. Write him a
letter to
1) make an apology, and
2) suggest a solution.
You should write about 100 words on the ANSWER SHEET.
Do not sign your own name at the end of the letter. Use “Li Ming” instead.
Dear Bob,
①How are you these days? ②Please say hello to Liz and Maple.
③I’ve got to say apology to you, due to my carelessness and the
crammed schedule before I left Canada, I forgot to return to you the music CD
of M.J. ④I discovered that only when I arrived home and started to unpack my
luggage. ⑤Fortunately, one of my colleagues is leaving for your city next week,
and he has promised to take the CD to you directly. ⑥Also, he’ll take to you
some small gifts from my family.
⑦All my best wishes!
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主讲老师：杨凡达老师
Welearn写作宝典英语二
Yours,
Li Ming
B节官方范文精讲
①The above is a table showing the vehicle-related traffic accidents in the year
2005, as is contrasted with those of the corresponding classes or categories in
the previous year. ②There are 5 classes of vehicle-related accidents in the
table, divided in accordance with the causes of the accidents. ③Of all the 5
classes of accidents, 4 have gone up, and only one goes down slightly, showing
a worsening situation.
④Of the 4 classes of accidents that have gone up, the largest in scale of
increase (15%) comes in the accidents caused by drivers who have drunk
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主讲老师：杨凡达老师
Welearn写作宝典英语二
alcohol. ⑤Under the influence of alcohol, drivers are liable to lose their control
or even consciousness, thus causing disasters. ⑥The total banning of alcohol
from the drivers who are about to drive is in nature an action to save lives.
⑦Unfortunately, over four hundred pedestrians have become victims of traffic
accidents due to their own carelessness.
⑧A conclusion can be easily drawn that strict observance of traffic laws and
regulations, both drivers and pedestrians, is the precondition and a necessity
of avoiding traffic accidents. ⑨Wheeled vehicles have been invented and
produced as a help to human life, rather than a killer of human lives.
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