父母与孩子是平等的。错怪孩子，应该当面承认错误。原文作者为纽约州少年教育协会朱丽亚·布里兹博士。

向小女儿道歉

（美国）朱丽亚·布里兹  王志成（编译）

家里来了客人，在吃饭时，4岁的女儿琳达将吃了一半的加勒比海虾吐了出来，连喊味道不好。

加勒比海虾是今天才买的，大家都吃了，并没发现异味，唯独女儿喊味道不好，我想，这一定是她“人来疯”，故意调皮捣蛋。在众多客人面前这样不文明，我一气之下伸手给了她一巴掌。

当时，琳达虽没有哭出声，但眼泪像断了线的珠子往下掉。

饭后客人走了，我将女儿的不是讲给妻子凯伦听。凯伦却说这不怪女儿，怪她自己。原来，头天晚上吃剩的一些海虾忘了放冰箱，今天上午妻子又买了海虾，在烹饪时，顺手将昨天吃剩的几只海虾放了进去，女儿吃的海虾肯定是昨天剩的。

看来，确实是我错怪了女儿。

傍晚，琳达从幼儿园回来，早把中午的委屈忘得一干二净，可我一直放心不下：平时孩子做错了事，我们呵斥，甚至体罚，让她认错，但我们做父母的错怪了孩子，就这样算了吗？

吃过晚饭，我将琳达叫进书房，当着她妈妈的面，向琳达认了错，请她原谅爸爸。女儿表现得若有所思的样子：“我一直等你道歉呢，你终于道了歉，算你还是一个诚实的爸爸。”

父母对孩子负有管教的义务，孩子做错了事，有责任批评教育，有时不妨严格一点。但是，在人格上父母与孩子是平等的，孩子也有自尊心。当父母一时疏忽错怪了孩子，就应该诚恳地当面向孩子承认错误，求得孩子的谅解。这样不但不会损害父母在孩子心目中的威信和尊严，而且通过感情上的平等交流，会更加融洽孩子与父母间的关系，使孩子增强明辨是非的观念。

“当然，要做父母的当面向稚气未脱的孩子认错道歉，是需要有点勇气的。”我对凯伦说，“可为了建立我们父母与孩子之间的和谐关系，让琳达在健康文明的家庭环境中成长，我们非得这样做不可。”

对此，妻子凯伦也很赞同。

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Apologize to the youngest daughter

Julia Blitz

Home to the guests, at dinner, four year old daughter Linda will eat half of the Caribbean shrimp spit on the floor, and even shouting bad taste. The Caribbean sea shrimp is today to buy, all eat, and no smell, but the daughter called taste is not good, I think, it is certain that she made a "Crazy", deliberately mischievous. In front of so many guests uncivilized, I angrily reached out and gave her a slap. At that time, although Linda did not cry, but tears like broken wire beads down.

After dinner, the guests left, I will not speak to his daughter Karen wife. Karen said this thing is not to blame her daughter, blame her. Originally, some shrimp night leftover forget the fridge this morning, his wife bought shrimp in cooking, he will be a few leftover shrimp yesterday put in, daughter to eat shrimp is certainly left yesterday.

It is indeed my daughter wronged.

In the evening, Linda got home from the kindergarten, early to noon reluctantly forgotten, but I've been worried: usually the child does something wrong, we shouted, even corporal punishment, let her admit, but we do parents wronged child, that is it? After dinner, I called Linda into the study, in front of her mother's face, to recognize Linda wrong, please forgive her father. Thoughtful daughter said: "I have been waiting for you to apologize? You finally apologized for being an honest father."

Parents have the obligation to discipline their children, the child did something wrong, have the responsibility to criticize education, and sometimes it may be a little strict. However, on the personality of the parents and children are equal, the child has self-esteem. When parents inadvertently wronged child, should be sincere when facing the children to admit mistakes, obtain the children's understanding. This will not only damage the parents in the eyes of the child's prestige and dignity, but also through the emotional exchange of equality, will be more harmonious relationship between children and their parents, so that children can enhance the concept of right and wrong.

Of course, parents face to face childish child apology, needs a bit of courage; "I said to Karen," but, in order to establish a harmonious relationship between our parents and children, let Linda grow up in a healthy and civilized family environment, we have to do this."

In this regard, his wife Karen also agreed.