披着狼皮的羊

最近在刷抖音的时候，看到一个关于老师的短视频，场景是教室门口，有一名学生在门口罚站，一群记者正在采访那名老师。一名记者问到：“请问，上课时间，你让一个十一二岁的小姑娘站在教室外面，这不算体罚吗？”那名老师回答道：“你这话什么意思（这时，老师猛地夺过话筒，正脸面对着镜头），现在的学生，是打不得、骂不得也批评不得。学生犯错误，老师也不敢批评，为什么呢？还搞什么赏识教育，拼命的夸学生，就是因为你们这些媒体，在给他们撑腰，老师打学生，你们就像苍蝇闻到臭肉迫不及待地扑上去，恨不得把老师都整进监狱里去，反过来呢，学生打老师你们管过吗？你们到底想让我么老师怎么做？看着学生犯错误，我们不闻不问，让我们看着他们，一步一步走向深渊，我们可以这样做吗？但是，我们是老师，我们的良心不允许我们这样做。”看完之后，我感触颇深，视频中老师的慷慨激昂让我联想到很多，当然，无论如何，我们都不能体罚学生，这是一个底线。但是，我们老师也不能因噎废食从而对于学生的问题不管不顾。学生出现了问题，我们要正确看待，并且要学会用正确的方式去处理。我们不能为了解决问题而解决问题。就像找校长提到的，我们要有结构化思维，通过孩子犯的错误，我们去发现他的背后家庭教育的问题、人际交往的问题以及个人性格习惯的问题等等。找到问题的根源然后对症下药，有时候我们需要批评学生，有时候需要引导孩子通过努力老弥补自己的错误，甚至有时候我们还要引导孩子立下承诺。我们要告诉孩子老师相信他，但是我们绝对不能天真的认为一次教育技能改变这个孩子，教育是个慢的艺术，孩子的问题也容易反复，老师需要的是足够的耐心。让孩子的每次一错误都成为我们教育的机会。

教育从来都不只有温暖和呵护，有时候更多的是磨练和督促，尤其是在全面杜绝体罚的大环境下，老师们各个投鼠忌器，教育更需要点狼性和血性。在这里分享一篇演讲文章：'I Wish You Bad Luck.' Read Supreme Court Justice John Roberts' Unconventional Speech to His Son's Graduating Class.

Congratulations, class of 2017. You’ve reached an important milestone. An important stage of your life is behind you. I’m sorry to be the one to tell you it is the easiest stage of your life, but it is in the books. While you’ve been at Cardigan, you have all been a part of an important international community as well. And I think that needs to be particularly recognized.[Roberts gave brief remarks in other languages.]Now around the country today at colleges, high schools, middle schools, commencement speakers are standing before impatient graduates. And they are almost always saying the same things. They will say that today is a commencement exercise. ‘It is a beginning, not an end. You should look forward.’ And I think that is true enough, however, I think if you’re going to look forward to figure out where you’re going, it’s good to know where you’ve been and to look back as well. And I think if you look back to your first afternoon here at Cardigan, perhaps you will recall that you were lonely. Perhaps you will recall that you were a little scared, a little anxious. And now look at you. You are surrounded by friends that you call brothers, and you are confident in facing the next step in your education.It is worth trying to think why that is so. And when you do, I think you may appreciate that it was because of the support of your classmates in the classroom, on the athletic field and in the dorms. And as far as the confidence goes, I think you will appreciate that it is not because you succeeded at everything you did, but because with the help of your friends, you were not afraid to fail. And if you did fail, you got up and tried again. And if you failed again, you got up and tried again. And if you failed again, it might be time to think about doing something else. But it was not just success, but not being afraid to fail that brought you to this point.Now the commencement speakers will typically also wish you good luck and extend good wishes to you. I will not do that, and I’ll tell you why. From time to time in the years to come, I hope you will be treated unfairly, so that you will come to know the value of justice. I hope that you will suffer betrayal because that will teach you the importance of loyalty. Sorry to say, but I hope you will be lonely from time to time so that you don’t take friends for granted. I wish you bad luck, again, from time to time so that you will be conscious of the role of chance in life and understand that your success is not completely deserved and that the failure of others is not completely deserved either. And when you lose, as you will from time to time, I hope every now and then, your opponent will gloat over your failure. It is a way for you to understand the importance of sportsmanship. I hope you’ll be ignored so you know the importance of listening to others, and I hope you will have just enough pain to learn compassion. Whether I wish these things or not, they’re going to happen. And whether you benefit from them or not will depend upon your ability to see the message in your misfortunes.Now commencement speakers are also expected to give some advice. They give grand advice, and they give some useful tips. The most common grand advice they give is for you to be yourself. It is an odd piece of advice to give people dressed identically, but you should — you should be yourself. But you should understand what that means. Unless you are perfect, it does not mean don’t make any changes. In a certain sense, you should not be yourself. You should try to become something better. People say ‘be yourself’ because they want you to resist the impulse to conform to what others want you to be. But you can’t be yourself if you don't learn who are, and you can’t learn who you are unless you think about it.

文章大体意思是：通常的毕业典礼上，演讲者们会不吝最美好的祝福，希望你们能有好运。我可不会那么做。为什么呢？请君为我倾耳听。将来的年复一年中，我希望你能遭遇不公平的对待，那样你才会知道公正的价值。我希望你会遭遇背叛，它能让你懂得忠诚的重要性。抱歉，但我还是希望你会被孤独所侵，这样你才不会认为友情来得理所当然。我再次希望你时不时会走点霉运，那样你才会意识到机遇在生活中的角色，才能了解你的成功并不是命里注定的，而别人的失败也不是理当如此。当你经历一次次的失败，我希望你的对手会因你的失败而欢呼，只有这样才能让你知道竞技精神的重要性。我希望你遭遇过被轻视，那样才会懂得倾听他人。我期望你能遭遇足够的伤痛来学会同情与怜悯。无论我是否这样期望，那些不幸终究会发生。但是否应验了吃亏是福，则取决于你从不幸中总结经验的能力。看完这个演讲之后，我决定要让孩子们看一下，就像是老人们说的那样：“吃亏是福。”当你遇到问题的时候，当你遇到挫折的时候，当你和同学发生矛盾的时候，当你被学习的压力压垮的时候，当你面对着遥不可及的梦想而哭泣的时候，你才知道会什么是成长。赵校长也说过：“深刻的教育来自于深刻的体验。”

如果你是一名老师，那么请你做一只披着狼皮的羊：在内心，你有羊的善良，羊的温柔，羊的细腻，羊的慈祥；而外在，你有狼的凶猛、狼的坚韧，狼的血性，狼的野心。